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The Leadership Mistake I Had to Unlearn

Writer's picture: Kristi FaltorussoKristi Faltorusso

Early in my leadership career, I made a critical mistake—I gave feedback without examples.


I thought I was being helpful, offering insights to guide my team’s development. But in reality, I was just leaving them confused, frustrated, and unsure of what to do next.


I’d say things like:


❌ “Be more strategic.”

❌ “You need to collaborate more.”

❌ “Engage executives meaningfully.”

❌ “You have to think about business impact.”

❌ “Your customer conversations need to be more valuable.”


Looking back, I cringe.


What does any of that even mean? How could anyone act on such vague directives?


Feedback Without Examples Isn’t Feedback—It’s Just an Opinion


And opinions don’t drive change.


I had to change my approach, and once I did, everything shifted.


The Fix: How I Made Feedback Actionable


Here’s what I did differently:


Documented Specific Examples – Instead of broad statements, I captured real behaviors. I noted what was said, how it landed, and why it mattered.


Gave Feedback in Real Time – No more waiting for formal 1:1s. If something needed to be addressed, I did it immediately while it was still fresh.


Provided Context – Instead of just telling someone what to change, I made sure they understood why it mattered.


Offered Alternatives – I didn’t just call out issues; I gave them concrete examples of what they could have done differently.


Asked for Their Input – I made sure my feedback was clear, then invited their perspective. Clarity and alignment matter more than my opinion.


Recognized Progress – When I saw improvement, I called it out. Reinforcing the right behaviors was just as important as correcting the wrong ones.


This small but critical shift made a massive impact—not just on individual growth, but on team performance overall.


Before Giving Feedback, Ask Yourself:


🔹 Will this actually help them improve, or am I just venting?

🔹 Have I provided specific examples they can learn from?

🔹 Am I making it clear why this feedback matters?


Giving effective feedback isn’t just a leadership skill—it’s a responsibility.


If we want our teams to grow, we need to give them something tangible to work with.

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